Of Glitz and Fury
by Darkness of 42
Summary: After the Dark Star incident, Fawful is revived, intent on revenge. With no means of supporting himself, he turns to the Glitz Pit, where he becomes a rising star. However, when the Bros and their allies get involved, a sinister conspiracy unravels.
1. Epilogue:Rebirth of the Fury

**A/N: My Mario obssession leads me to yet another Mario fanfic. This time, its all about Fawful, the best villain since Bowser...for he has FURY!**

**I gotta admit, I feel a tad guilty about this one: There was another fanfic that involved a short story about Fawful working at the Glitz Pit (which I really enjoyed), but I'll do my best to make this a very original fic!**

**And now, I present, "Of Glitz and Fury"!**

* * *

**Prologue **

He shouldn't have been alive.

There was no way, not even in the fractured logic of the Mushroom Kingdom, where one could be brought back from death's door with food items, should a being be able to survive as a few corrupted strands of DNA strewn within the bowels of a great monster.

But he had done it. Against all possible odds, he had done it.

Slowly, but surely, the surviving dark cells that remained of him congregated together, to form a blob of pure darkness. Not alive, but far, far from being dead.

And as these cells gathered, they began multiplying. To power this mitosis, they parasitically drew energy from the fleshy guts of their host, the mighty Koopa King, Bowser.

This threw Bowser's bodily system completely out of whack, leaving him susceptible to illness. His temperature rose, his muscles ached, and he felt like he was going vomit.

Finally, on a day when Bowser was feeling particularly nauseas, the massive Koopa did just that. And what came out was a foul, tar-like substance. Bowser flushed it down the toilet, thinking that was the end of that.

But he was wrong.

The dark matter traveled down the toilet, through the Castle's pipe network, and landed in the sewers, where it would lie, like a dead body.

But it wasn't dead. It grew, and grew, radiating a dark power that kept even the wild sewer Goombas away.

Then, after a month of developing, the massive hardened shell it had become cracked. This split instigated a series of other cracks, which spread like wildfire across the carapace.

Finally, with a great tremor, it shattered, and like a cocoon sheltering a butterfly, a small creature hopped out from the debris.

But it wasn't a butterfly. It was a person, fully clothed in a red cape, possessing dark green skin, and bore a smile that was so cold, it could chill even the hardiest of souls.

This being stepped out from the fragments of the shell he had spent so much time re-developing in, ecstasy being his prime emotion.

But there was another feeling...a powerful hatred that coursed through his brain, making his spiral-tinged glasses flash with anger, as he thought about the two he hated most...Red...and Green...

And he threw back his head, and cried out his first words that he had spoken in this new body of his...expressing his hatred, which echoed throughout the dark sewers, frightening the damp creatures within.

These words, dripping with hate, would haunt the the dreams of those who heard it forever.

"I...have...FURY!"

* * *

**Chapter One: Rebirth of the Fury**

"My cape, it is soaked with the yuck of the sewers that I hate."

Fawful, ex-toady, dark lord, and one of the most dangerous villains after Bowser himself, was traversing through the massive sewer network of the Musrhoom Kingdom, quietly contemplating his newfound existence.

The last thing he remembered was lying in the pit of Bowser's innards, weakened, his body swallowed by darkness, those filthy brothers and their 'staches.

And now here he was, somehow fully revived in an unknown part of the Mushroom Kingdom sewer network, damp, hungry, and above all, filthy.

And yet...he was strangely happy.

"I have chortles..." he muttered to himself "...for Fawful made the Mario Bros that he hates disappear, like a particularly scrumptious hot-dog in the hands of a man who knows no self control!" he began rubbing his hands with excitement. "Fawful had the exploding...killing the red and green that fog his head with hatred! No hatred...no fogging...and Fawful somehow managed the surviving!"

As he walked, the Beanish boy began noting familiar landmarks...certain pipe formations, pathways, even mold species...he was getting close to his destination...the sewers beneath Princess Peach's castle.

"Ah yes, Fawful is cheering with excitement...for when Fawful reaches his old shop, the plans will begin with newness!" Said Fawful. "Good thing I had the foresight to be leaving a fallback plan at my store! Once more, no baby's candy will be safe from my clutches! Soon, the foul stench of Fawful's ruling will wreak through the Mushroom Kingdom, like a..."

He was interrupted by the fact that the floor of the sewers was suddenly rushing at his face. It took a split second to realize that he was falling on his face. Another split second later, his bean-shaped head connected with the hard floor. Painfully.

"Ouchness!" He cried, as the horrifically painful jolt shot through his skull. "It is the floor!"

Scrambling to his feet, Fawful held his throbbing head. Looking down, he noticed what had caused him to trip.

It was an empty can of Chuckola Cola.

Any normal person would have written this off as mindless littering. Fawful, however, was far from normal.

"A can that once held soda is in the sewers that nobody of civilness inhabits?" The Beanish boy wondered, still hold his head. Looking around, Fawful noticed more cans, along with bags of chips, plastic wraps, and other pieces of litter strewn around the sewer floor.

Fawful was not alone here.

Fearing the worst, Fawful ran for his shop as fast as his little legs could carry him.

* * *

As Fawful ran, he started recognizing his surroundings.

Those pipes...the brick layout...even that bit of mold shaped like the head of some famous celebrity.

He knew exactly where he was. Just below Peach's Castle.

Then, he finally reached it...the green pipe that lead to his old shop.

To his horror, he found that the grates separating the pipe from the sewer where broken off. Anything small enough to fit could have crawled in and wreaked havoc.

"Fawful is having worry." Fawful murmured to himself. "I am investigating this occurrence that is making me have worry!"

The Beanish boy fell on his hands and knees, and attempted to crawl into the pipe. He barely fit, having grown since he last entered it.

Grunting as he forced himself through the narrow pipe, Fawful heard voices coming from the other side of the pipe, in his Bean'n'Badge shop.

"Hey Vern, uh, whats this?"

"Looks like more worthless computer junk, Jim. Just throw it with the others."

Fawful was outraged that someone was in his store, messing with his things.

"Fawful will be making the faces of the intruders that he hates hurt with badness!" He grunted, struggling to unstick himself from a particularly narrow part of the pipe. "Once Fawful's rear is through the pipe of skinniness, he shall have punishment...for the inturders that he hates! Grr... must...have...unstuck..."

And with a great heave, the Beanish boy launched himself out of the pipe, like a bullet, and was suddenly sprawled on the damp floor of his store.

"Holy shrooms, what the heck is that, Vern?"

"Dunno, Jim. Looks like one of those "Beanish" guys."

Fawful jumped to his feet, and laughed.

"Ha ha, I scoff at the trespassers that I hate, who are being..." Looking around his surroundings, he noticed that the voices came from two Goombas standing in the middle of the store. "...Goombas...and I am demanding to know what your stupid faces are doing in my shop, not buying badges of goodness with the beans of payment! I HAVE FURIOUS CURIOSITY!"

The two fungus creatures looked at each other with curiosity, then spoke to Fawful.

"Look, kid," the one on the left said. "...we're with Her Majesty Peach's new program, "The Royal Castle Investigation Squad," and me and Jim here found this weird room down here. It's under Kingdom Investigation, no civilians allowed, so...you better leave."

"Yeah..." the other one, Jim, said. "...what he said."

Fawful clenched his fists.

"Fawful shall be leaving..." he muttered menacingly. "...he shall be leaving your teeth on the floor, and they shall be weeping with toothy sadness at being beaten by Fawful! I have the destroying of your faces!"

The two Goombas took a fighting stance. "Kid, we're authorized to use deadly force against threats. So if you would kindly back off..."

Cackling like a madman, Fawful lunged forward, intending to surprise the Goombas.

However, the fungus creatures where surprisingly fast, dodging out of his way at the last second.

Then, using uncharacteristic agility for Goombas, one swung around from behind, and knocked him flat on his face.

And before Fawful could so much as register the pain, the other Goomba launched itself in the air, and Headbonked Fawful right on his lower back, knocking the wind out of him.

Then he did it again. And again. And again, until Fawful started seeing rings of darkness creep on the edges of his eyes, due to the lack of oxygen reaching his brain.

Finally, the relentless Goomba stopped his vicious pounding, and turned to his partner with joyous surprise in his eyes.

"Vern...we did it! We actually BEAT somebody! Goombas!"

Vern jumped excitedly. "Holy shroomcake...we did!" He turned to the still-fallen Fawful, and kicked him in the side. "Pwned, you little freak!"

Then he turned to his fellow Goomba. "C'mon Jim...we better go get the Mario Bros to arrest this jerk."

So they hopped into the exit pipe, and walked off. Fawful heard one last piece of their conversation before they left.

"Okay Jim, wheres the map?"

"Inside a Chain Chomp."

"WHAT?!? You lost it!?! We could be stuck down here for hours!"

"Oh, lighten up, its an absolutely LOVELY day to be lost in...the sewers."

"I knew I should have used my paid vacation hours this week. I just knew it."

And they where gone.

Fawful decided to just lie there for a moment, absorbing the horrifying news he had just received.

"The...the...mustached Mario Bros that I hate...they have had the surviving...of Fawful's exploding attack of evil...Fawful must have the obtaining of money if he is to find a way to be destroying their faces with mustaches... "

Then with a mighty groan, he heaved himself up, and took a good look at his surroundings.

"Fawful's Bean'n'Badge...it has trash."

And so it did. The lights had long burned out, but it was still plain to see how wrecked the room had become. Litter was strewn across the floor, thanks to those wretched intruding Goombas Peach had sent, as well as various bits of worthless hardware unceremoniously thrown into a pile on the floor.

Speaking of the floor, it had completely lost it's warm, orange carpeting, being replaced by rank mold that grew upon it. And not just the carpet, it had spread through the very few items that had not been looted by trespassers.

Then there was the smell, which before had only been a mild, easily dismissive odor, but was now all but unbearable.

Fawful was disappointed at the state of his shop, and he knew that this place would never again serve as his home.

"But..." he said, his smile returning to his bruised face. "...Fawful is not here for living. He is hear for his secret stash of badges for coin-making!"

Long ago, Fawful had sold badges here, trading them for beans found around the Mushroom Kingdom. He would then sell these beans to rouge groups of Beanbean fugitives, who where homesick for their former country, for a much greater price then if he had simply sold the badges directly for coins.

When Fawful was ready to make an attempt at conquering the Mushroom Kingdom, he had a secret safe created to store all his most valuable badges, just in the very small case that he might need them sometime in the future.

Grateful for this forward thinking, Fawful leaped over the counter, much to his bruised body's protest, and moved a fake plaster wall, revealing and iron door that bore a picture of Fawful's grinning face.

The Beanish boy took hold of the combination lock, and entered a few numbers, humming as he did so.

"6-8-7-8-2-7-3, is the combo that works for me!" He said as he entered the vault's combination.

The door clicked as the tumblers fell in their place, and, laughing with childish delight, he threw open the safe, eager to see his collection of shiny, money-making badges.

He was met with rows of empty shelves.

Every single badge he had saved, all that time and hard work gone into stealing them...gone.

"No...the happening of this is not having reality! T-there must be badges for Fawful, it is only right!"

He franticly felt around the shelves, desperate to find SOMETHING.

His fingers came across small metal object. Fawful grabbed it, and examined it.

It was a single badge, looked over by the looters that had managed the guess the vault's combination. It was a fairly rare badge, and was worth quite a bit, to be sure. But, at best, it would buy him a couple of nights at a rundown inn, IF he wasn't recognized by the people there.

Fawful saw, staring back at him on the badge's reflective surface, a failure. A total failure of a toady.

This single badge, a glimpse of what could have been, of the diabolical plans that it's counterparts could have funded, was the final straw for the poor Bean boy.

He fell on his knees, and cried.

"O great mistress Cackletta..." he sobbed. "Fawful has failed in continuing the plans of yours. He is having failure...the bros have beaten him AND survived...the Bowser has eaten him...and now here he is, lying upon the filth with no means to have supporting of himself, like a filthy rat who has lost all his savings to greedy corporate schemes, knowing that his mistress looks down upon him with shame."

He fell on his back. "And now, Fawful shall be lying here, awaiting the mustard of doom to claim his failure of a soul. I am having sorry, O Great Cackletta that I miss."

He closed his eyes, waiting for his game to end.

Darkness seeped in his mind.

Slowly, he felt his limbs go numb with tiredness.

He felt sleep coming...it touched his soul, and he the peace of slumber slowly drift in his brain...

Then he heard a piece of paper fluttering.

Fawful opened his eyes. "Are Fawful's ears deceiving him? There is not being a breeze to be moving papers down in the sewers of muck, where Fawful's game shall be ending."

Curiosity getting the better of him he sat up, and scanned his shop.

Damp and muck over there.

Dirt and filth there.

Wet, smell, and a poster over there...wait!

Fawful leaped over the counter, for he saw what looked like a flier posted against the wall.

It was covered in fantastic, eye-catching splashes of color. It stood out against the dark sewer muck so much, Fawful was amazed that he hadn't seen it before. It was as if it hadn't been there a moment before...

Forgetting, for the moment, about his plan to die, Fawful looked over the poster in curiosity. It had had a picture of a smiling Chain Chomp on it.

"ARE YOU DOWN ON YOUR LUCK?" The first line screamed.

Fawful blinked. "I say to you, yes."

"DO YOU NEED COINS TO SPEND?"

"It is being correct!

"OR, ARE YOU SIMPLY HAVING FURY THAT NEEDS AN OUTLET?"

Fawful grinned. "I have lots of fury!"

"THEN COME..." the poster read. "...TO THE ONE...THE ONLY....GLITZ PIT! LOCATED IN THE SCENIC FLYING CITY OF GLITZVILLE, YOU CAN COME AND SIGN UP FOR THE ULTIMATE FIGHT OF YOUR LIFE!

GET THE THE CHANCE TO MEET THE FERAL NUCLEAR REACTOR, RAWK HAWK! AND EARN $$$!""

Fawful stared at this line, an idea popping in his brain. "Where might Fawful be finding this flying city that has Glitz?"

"GO TO THE TOWN OF ROUGEPORT, FIND THE CHEEP-CHEEP BLIMP, WHERE YOU SHALL BE WHISKED TO A WORLD OF SWEATY GLORY! NOW...LETS BRAWL!"

Fawful held the bright poster in his hands, quivering with excitement.

"Fawful shall go to this Glitz Pit, and fight with much fierceness, to earn the coins of money! Then, with my new richness, I will be funding a new, even better plan of Mushroom conquering! I have brilliance! The enchilada of intelligence has given Fawful much cheese!"

Then a thought occurred to him. Without the aid of technology, or dark magic, he wasn't in any shape to take on so much as a Goomba, as a recent encounter had taught him.

Then something caught his eye. A pile of seemingly worthless hardware...seemingly. Fawful saw what looked a vacum pump, which would require only a minimal amount of tinkering to fix, and perhaps there was even a salvageable lazer to be found.

"Fawful shall have fighting edge...with weapons!"

He grabbed a moldy curtain, laid it flat on the floor, grabbed whatever pieces of junk that he thought could be useful, and threw it on upon the curtain. He tied that to the end of a stick, which he slung behind his back.

Looking very much like a runaway child expecting to have the adventure of his life, Fawful gazed into the shiny surface of his sole badge.

He saw, staring back at him, a hopeful, loyal servant of the greatest villain of all time, ready to truly avenge his late mistress.

"O great Cackletta..." he muttered. "Now Fawful shall be earning your respect once of more, and he shall have the ruling of all Kingdom that irritates him like a cold of much sneezing bugs! You shall have seeing."

And with that, the Beanish boy stuffed the badge into his pocket, and was off.

Well, first he to crawl through the tight sewer pipe to exit his shop, made all the more awkward with his lumpy package of metal items.

But once he was out, he gave a great chortle of joy, and with the town of Rougeport in his sights, he was off.

He never saw the pair of beady eyes staring at him through the darkness, glinting with malice, and a cruel smile etched beneath them

* * *

**A/N: I have cliffhanger! To be continued!**


	2. Adventure in Rougeport

Chapter Two: Adventure in Rougeport

* * *

"Psst...hey, kid...we're almost at that town you where talking of..."

Fawful awoke from his sleep with a headache. The sea, he had found out, was not his element, as he traveled across the ocean in a dinghy boat.

"Ah, but the cramping pains are not stopping Fawful." He said to himself. "For I have determination! Much chortles will be had by me when I am being in the coin-making town of Glitzville! And if the sea of stomach-barfing is needing to be crossed by Fawful, then the crossing shall be had by Fawful!"

The Toad captain coughed intrusively. "Um, not to interrupt your mental breakdown, but we're pulling up to Rougeport now."

Fawful leaped out of bed, grabbed his luggage of electronic items, and went on deck to see the sight.

The steam-driven boat slowly chugged its way to the docks of the town of Rougeport, home of thieves, villains, and the legendary Thousand-Year Door.

Even from a distance, it was clear that the citizens had little sense of proper maintenance. It looked dirty and broken down. Despite this, it radiated a feeling of adventure, excitement, and perhaps just a touch of magic.

Finally, the vessel pulled up to port. Fawful leaned so far off the edge of the boat, he nearly fell off.

"It has finality!" He shouted eagerly. "Now, captain of the stomach-puking ship that I hate, you may be letting Fawful off now, to be off to the city where he shall have coins of kingdom-conquering!"

"Hold there, kiddo!" The captain called. "Ya still haven't given me that badge yet!"

Fawful frowned. In order to pay off the journey across the sea, Fawful had bribed the captain into taking his only badge. He had held on to the piece of metal for as long as he could, not wanting to be rid of it.

Pulling out the shiny item, Fawful gazed once more into the reflective surface. "O great Cackletta..." he whispered. "...Fawful's journey of much awesome is having its beginning. Fawful will have pride from you...do not be worrying."

And with that, he flicked the badge toward the Toad captain, who in turn lowered the plank for the Beanish boy. Fawful hopped ashore.

"Watch yer back here..." the Toad called out. "This town ain't built for youngin's like you."

And with that, the boat pulled away from the dock, chugging off into the deep blue sea..

Fawful stared off to the boat, with his last badge aboard. Then, when it disappeared into the horizon, he turned to face his new destiny.

Fawful felt his emotional level spike. The sound of the crashing waves...the salty smell in the air...the sight of the ships coming and going in their most magical manner...all these things spoke to Fawful's soul.

Imagining a title scene occurring over his head Fawful laughed jauntily. "Ah, the town, it has adventure! Fawful is inspired, like a weeping novelist who is suddenly no longer weeping at his lack of imagination! I have wonder...I have optimism...I have...WAAGH!"

Something pushed into Fawful, causing him to tumble into the ocean. Poor Fawful spluttered for a moment, trying to keep his head above the water, when something tried to bite him.

Leaping out, like a flying shark, Fawful landed right on the hard, wooden docks.

"Ha!" Someone shouted. "Man, you looked so stupid, me pushing you in the water and all!"

Fawful looked up to see a blue-robed guy wearing a smirking mask. A Bandit.

"Too bad you didn't have any coins on you." The Bandit said. "But, hey, that was HE-larious!"

Laughing, the blue creature ran off.

Spitting out seawater, Fawful glared angrily.

"When Fawful has had the conquering of Mushroom Kingdom, Fawful shall be turning this town of dumps into a lot for parking."

* * *

Fawful made his way through the town square, taking in the sights as he went.

The people where quite different then what Fawful was used to. They didn't seem as vibrant or as colorful as the creatures where back in the mainstream Mushroom Kingdom, or the Beanbean Kingdom. In fact, they seemed a little...flat. Paper-flat, even.

He then examined the town itself.

"I have notation...the notation of saying that this town is being in need of fixing up."

Indeed, Rougeport was not a gleaming metropolis, rather a run down-down shanty town of a city. In the center, was a set of gallows, its rope swinging ominously. Fawful shuddered at its spooky presence, almost wishing he had not come at all. But, somewhere here, there was a blimp to take him to a better place, Glitzville. The trick was simply to find it.

"Hey, you lost or something?"

Fawful spun around, to see a Goomba wearing a green snow hat standing in front of the gallows.

"A Goomba! Is the Goomba that I am now seeing going to attempt to have the bonking of Fawful's doom, like the others that he has encountered?"

The capped fungus stared at the Beanish boy. "Nooo...I was just wondering if you were lost. Cuz this ain't the right place you wanna get lost in...thieves and all that."

"Oh...well Fawful is wanting to find the town of Glitzville, which is having a place where Fawful can have fury upon people who he can beat up for coins, which will be funding a plan of conquering the weeping mushroom that is your face!"

The Goomba blinked. "I have no idea what you just said...but I heard "Glitzville", and the blimp to take you there is over on the East side of town. You can't miss it."

Fawful grinned. "The thankings I have! Perhaps the salami of mercy shall strike your head under Fawful's dictatorship! I have leaving!"

And with that, he ran off in search of the Glitzville blimp.

* * *

It was early in the morning. The Cheep-Cheep ticket-counter was just standing around, humming a little bit to while away the time while he waited for passengers to Glitzville.

Then something happened. A crazy looking green guy in a red cape jumped out.

"Greetings, fishy Cheep-Cheep who I am currently not hating with drizzled rage! I am needing to board that flying vessel that has resemblance to your face! I shall have chortles of grateful happiness upon it, for Fawful is needing to board it for purposes of coin-making and mushroom conquering in Glitzville, like a crazed person who is needing coin-making and mushroom-conqeuring type things to happen to him! I HAVE LACK OF GOOD SIMILES!"

The Cheep-Cheep maintained a placid look. "That is absolutely wonderful, sir. If you could just show me your ticket, I can let you through."

The freaky kid's massive smile fell. "Ticket? What is being the use of a ticket of uselessness?"

"Well, I need to see a ticket before you can board. Its part of the rules." The Cheep-Cheep explained.

"The rage of drizzling that I was not having, I am NOW having! You are moving your puffy face for Fawful, like a stupid dog who is to too stupid to disobey his master with chortles!"

He tried to move past the Cheep-Cheep, but the ticket-counter was too swift to let him pass.

"I am sorry, sir, but I simply must see a ticket before I can let you pass."

The kid frowned. "I shall have the opening of a sushi-restaurant of your doom, where the head of you shall be boiled to a crispy treat of stupidness!"

"That sounds absolutely lovely, sir. But I can't let through without a ticket."

"Grr...I have fury..."

The caped kid grumbled a little more, then stomped off. The Cheep-Cheep smiled, as irritating the heck out of people was the highlight of it's workday.

* * *

"Goomba who has had the helping of Fawful! Are you having more advice of usefulness to be handing me?"

The fungus, upon seeing Fawful, gave a friendly grin. "Sure, kid! Did you find the blimp okay?"

"The blimp had easiness to spy, but the easiness of boarding it is not matching. Are you knowing where a ticket of blimp-boarding could be found?"

To Fawful's surprise, the Goomba's expression suddenly went very dark. "Listen here...people can die asking questions like that 'round these parts. Nobody wants to mess with...them."

And with that, he walked off.

"Wellness!" Fawful exclaimed. "Fawful shall just have to have the asking of people who are being much nicer to one who is evil...that is me!"

* * *

As Fawul trudged through the streets, he recapped his day in Rougeport

Every time he had approached somebody and asked about tickets, they all either backed off, or told him to get lost. Some had told him that they didn't want to get involved with the Syndicate...whatever that was.

"Is everybody here having crazieness?" The Beanish boy wondered.

He walked into a building with a sign that said "Pianta Parlor" upon it.

Noticing a Toad girl playing an arcade game, Fawful walked up. "You, who plays games of fun, are you going to have the telling to Fawful about where the finding of Glitzville tickets can had?"

The Toad girl glared at him "You wanna death wish or something, buddy?" and returned to her game.

Fawful rubbed his face. "This is being a trouble that has greatness for a piece of paper that is a ticket."

"You lookin' for a ticket for something, son?"

Turning his head, Fawful saw a tall, plant-headed Pianta, wearing sunglasses and a gangster-style fedora, standing in the corner of the Parlor.

"Fawful is saying yes...but when Fawful is asking about them, the few people who have nicenss suddenly stop having the niceness!The irritation is tickling my nose with gustav!"

The Pianta touched his chin. "Hmm...well dat doesnt surprise me much. To get da tickets round here, ya need to go directly to da Pianta Syndicate. And hey, nobody wants to mess with DAT bunch. I should know...I used to be da boss of it. Names Don Pianta, son."

Fawful bolted upright. "Wait...so your are having affiliation with the organization that can be giving Fawful tickets to Glitzville?"

The Don laughed. "Yeah, I suppose you could say dat. Me and Frankie, da boss, we 're tight, like latex tight. He married my daughter, and now we're all one big, happy, extorting-type family."

Fawful jumped. "I have asking...can you be hooking Fawful up with tickets that shall be whisking Fawful to the flying city of Glitz?"

The Don looked upward, rubbed his chin thoughtfully, then replied; "No."

Fawful's face went red. "Fury! I have it! I shall rain many weeping potatoes of doom upon the stupid head of yourself! Your face shall hurt so much, it shall be paying medical bills until the time when it stops hurting, which shall be the longest of times! I! HAVE! RAGE!"

The entire parlor went silent, awaiting to see what the Don of Untimely Death would do to this poor sucker.

Much to everybody's surprise, he started laughing.

"Ha ha ha!...I like you, kid, ya got guts...and maybe I won't spill 'em on them floor right now."

He placed a hefty arm on the Beanish boy's shoulder. "Tell ya what...I'll take ya to see "Furious Frankie", and maybe ya can get da ticket. After that, though, your on your own. You'll have to get da ticket for yourself, capisce?"

Fawful's trademark smile boomeranged back. "I say to you, yes!"

"Then come wit me...and I'll show ya the marvelous world of organized crime."

* * *

"It has dump!" Fawful noted, as he stood outside the Pianta Syndicate center of business. "I have disappointment at the filth of the headquarters for the Syndicate for the Piantas!"

Ignoring Fawful, the Don knocked on the house's door. "Now listen up, son. I let that whole "yelling at me at the Parlor" thing slide, but Frankie might not be feeling so generous. Ya have to hold dat freaky tongue of yours, or they'll hold it against the wall with a pair of pliers and a mean attitude, capisce?"

"I have capisce." Fawful confirmed.

"No bold statements."

"Yessing."

"No threats."

"Of coursing."

"And speak calmly...ya don't wanna surprise a mobster, got it?"

"I have had the getting of it."

Don Pianta opened the door, and stepped aside. "Then go in there, and get dat ticket!"

Fawful walked in, confident in his abilities to remain calm, cool, and collected.

He saw four Piantas, two muscular ones standing in the corner, one yellow female standing behind a desk, talking to a blue male.

The blue one, with his hardened face, was obviously Frankie, the Syndicate Boss. Fawful had an instant and irrational dislike of him.

"Hey, dis is a private conversation here." Frankie said, noticing Fawful. "And who do you think you are, just barging in like dat?"

Fawful was tempted to shout out random taunts and this jerk, but, remembering Don Pianta's advice, held his tongue.

"Who do I think I am? I am thinking that I am Fawful, for I am. And you are being a boss who is having much richness and power. Fawful is asking you, without the threats that he was told not to use, if you could be giving Fawful a ticket for the Glitzville blimp."

He wanted to barf, asking this plant-brained idiot for help.

He turned to the female Pianta next to him. "Hold on for one minute, puddin' pie, I gots a customer."

The Pianta did not respond, as she seemed fixated upon Fawful.

"Okay den. You've come to da right place for tickets to Glitzville...we gots Business Class tickets for a thousand coins, Second Class tickets for ten thousand coins, and First Class for a million coins. Which do ya want?"

Fawful almost choked, which was surprising, since he didn't have anything in his mouth. "What is the being the meaning of such expensiveness?!? Fawful is having ridicule towards the prices of those pieces of paper!"

"Hey, Glitzville tickets are hard to come by, even for da Syndicate." Frankie replied. "Gotta make a living somehow."

"Fawful is not having ANY coins! That is being the whole of the reason that Fawful is trying to GET to the stupid city of Glitz in first places!"

"What, you think that da Syndicate just hands out rare and expensive stuff like party favors? If ya don't have da cash, den ya don't have business here. Have a nice day."

This smarmy, patronizing tone, combined with his already agitated mood, was the last straw for Fawful.

"I SHALL STAB YOU WITH THE MUSTARD OF YOUR DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!"

And he leaped at Frankie, intending to throttle his head off. However, one of the Pianta bodyguards grabbed him in midair, and squeezed him. Hard.

"Nobody makes a move at da boss's life on MY guard. Now you sleep wit da Bloopers."

It felt like a mountain was trying to squeeze his innards out. Fawful's bones where bending close to breaking, and he couldn't even breath. Every time he struggled, even a little, the Pianta's powerful grip would only grow tighter.

So...much...pain...

He closed his eyes, and waited for the end...

"STOP!"

Suddenly, the Pianta dropped Fawful to the floor. He gasped for air, but apart from a few bruises, he seemed fine.

Then, a sinister shadow loomed over Fawful. Looking up, he saw the large form of the female Pianta.

"Francesca, what's wrong, pumpkin?" Frankie asked.

Francesca didn't answer, instead looking down at Fawful with a fascinated expression.

"You barged into our home, demanded tickets from us, then tried to kill my husband. You are so...so...

Fawful closed his eyes, waiting for the insults to come.

"...FREAKING ADORABLE!"

Before Fawful could even blink, he was suddenly scooped into Francesca's arms, and was being tightly squeezed. She didn't grip him as hard the bodyguard Pianta had, but it still hurt plenty.

"Oh, you little cutie pie, you! You're just so sweet and adorable, I could eat you!"Francesca happily proclaimed.

"I have spinal disfigurement!" Fawful cried out.

Francesca dropped Fawful, then turned to her husband. "Oh, Frankie...we simply MUST help this poor boy out! I mean, look at him, he's so cute and funny! We have to do something!"

Frankie rubbed his forehead. "Puddin' pie, he tried to kill me..."

"Don't call me "puddin' pie", Frankie." Francesca angrily replied, letting Fawful fall to the floor. "And he didn't mean it. He's obviously too sweet, right sweetie?"

"Your squashing of Fawful, it shall earn you the destroying of your soul, like a wooden forest that weeps fiery gasoline!"

"See?" Francesca said pointedly. "Just a regular sweetheart. And listen here, if you don't get this poor, adorable boy his ticket, then I'll force you to say "I love you" nine thousand times! Maybe even more!"

Frankie paled. "But pudd...Francesca..."

"Did you just use the word "but" with me, Frankie? Did you?"

Frankie looked at his bodyguards, who simply shrugged.

Then, with a sigh, he stood up.

"Okay den. For you, Francesca."

He opened a drawer in his desk, and pulled out a blue slip of paper.

"Dis is a Business Class Ticket. Good for one ride to Glitzville and back. Happy?"

"Oh, THANK you Frankie! Your such a sweetheart!" Francesca cried, rushing over to Frankie and kissing his cheek.

The Syndicate boss sighed contentedly, then flicked the ticket over to Fawful. The Beanish boy caught it in midair.

"Ah, the ticket, it has been obtained by Fawful! Fawful is grateful to the one who is called Francesca! Now the destroying of your soul shall be put off for a while!"

With a satisfired grin, he walked out to the door, clutching his now very sore ribcage.

"I have farewell!"

"Bye, you sweet sugar dumpling!" Francesca called. "Now, Frankie, we need to start talking about kids. I'm thinking we should adopt, because now I want an adorable Beanish boy with cute, swirly glasses, like that one we just helped! And we can teach him to say adorable things, like, "I have love for you, mommy!", or "I shall give you the mustard of my sweetness!" And then he'll hug us, and love us, and..."

Fawful considered leaving behind a makeshift stink bomb for his least Syndicate boss. Then he decided that leaving him to listen to his wife's ramblings was punishment enough.

* * *

It was late afternoon. The Cheep-Cheep ticket-counter was just standing around, humming a little bit to while away the time while he waited for passengers to Glitzville.

Then something happened. Again.

"I have chortles at your defeat, Cheep-Cheep that I hate!"

The same Beanish kid from before jumped out.

"Now, like many lost remote controls, you are weeping! For your plan of Fawful's not going to Glitzville to earn coins of funding evil plans has had exploding! I would be weeping with sadness if today were opposite day! CHORTLES AT YOU!"

"That is lovely, sir." The placid-faced attendant said. "Do you have your ticket,now?"

Fawful presented his blue slip of paper. "Now, Fawful has sushi...the sushi of your disappointed face!"

"Very well, sir." The Cheep-Cheep said, stepping aside. "Just take that Pipe over to the Airfield, step on the blimp, and be on your way."

Fawful ran past the fishy ticket counter, and dove headfirst into the pipe. He popped out in a grassy field, where the Cheep-Cheep blimp he ha seen in the distance now hung over him like a storm cloud.

"And now, Fawful boards the blimp...the blimp of RICHNESS!"  


* * *

Once Fawful was comfortably seated in the blimp, he looked out the window, down to the earth.

"This is most likely the last time Fawful sees the ground for a longest of while." He said to the brown Toad seated next to him. "For Fawful shall be flying off to the city of Glitzville, which is high off the ground that Fawful shall not be seeing the the longest of while."

"Mmm hmm."

A Cheep-Cheep flight attendant hopped up to their seats. "Care for a complimentary paper, boys?"

"The yesness is what Fawful is speaking!"

Eager to have a way to pass the time, Fawful grabbed a paper from the Cheep-Cheep's flippers.

He took a good look at the headline. To his unpleasant surprise, there was a black-and-white photograph of the Mario Bros.

"MARIO COMES BACK FROM VACATION! CLAIMS TO HAVE A HAD A WONDERFUL, ADVENTURE-FREE TIME IN THE SUN! MUSHROOM KINGDOM REJOICES!

...in other news, Luigi saved the world from some threat or another..."

Fawful ripped the paper in half. "I have fury! The mustachioed menaces that are made from the sauce of much stupidness ALWAYS are having fame! Where is Fawful's fame? When shall Fawful be looked upon with respect and terror, as his fury rules all who are alive?"

"Escuse me, is there another seat avaliable?" The Toad asked the Cheep-Cheep.

Fawful glared at the ripped picture of the Mario Bros, hatred pouring from his eyes.

Then he noticed something. On the top-right corner of the paper.

The date. Was it possible?

Fawful's fury drained away, to be replaced by sadness

"I have...sorrow." He whispered, mostly to himself. "Upon this day, thirteen years ago...Cackletta adopted me, as a baby of diaper-stinking. I am being thirteen years of age."

As the memories of his late mistress flowed into his mind, a drop of water splashed onto the rough surface of the ripped newspaper. A teardrop.

"The Great C-Cackletta always had the assuming that Fawful... that I would be the prince of the Kingdom of Beanbean and Mushrooms b-by the time I had the turning into a t-teenager."

And crumbled up the paper angrily. "Instead, Fawful is having to beg for tickets and be bargaining badges that shine to ride stomach-puking boats. He oldness is not glorious, it is being shameful."

He looked upwards, looking almost angelic. "Cackletta, though your plans may have had delaying...I am promising, they shall not be ceasing! The mighty goo that has fury will swallow all who oppose our goal in a slimy, digestive doom! Your toady will make your name household! You will be remembered as an evil witch of nastiness that eveybody loves! You shall not be forgotten!"

He looked down at his lap, where his electronics where resting. "...I am promising."

"Really, are you SURE there are no other available seats?" The worried looking Toad begged.

A few moments later, the Cheep-Cheep blimp took off into the sunset, on its way to an amazing flying city of glitz, glory, and dreams.

Amongst its passengers, a few vacationing celebrities, some gamblers looking to make it big in the bets, and one eternally loyal toady


	3. Glitz

**Disclaimer: I am not owning Fawful or anything related to Mario that I did not convieve myself! If I did, then I would have chortles, though I still do!**

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* * *

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Chapter Three: Glitz

* * *

"...and so, Fawful had survived the squishing of the evil organization in Rougeport, then he had the ticket of much grateful flying to Glitzville, and now here he is, sitting in the seat of the blimp that is heading to Glitzville like a speeding snail with wings! And that is being the tale of Fawful!"

The brown Toad who had spent the past two hours sitting next to Fawful was shaking uncontrollably.

"P-please...just...just stop talking... take all my money, just please don't say another word in that horrible voice of yours..."

Fawful huffed. "Wellness, the annoyance I have at you! Your rudeness slaps Fawful's face with a beefy turkey that is irritating!"

The Toad broke down and cried.

Fawful sighed, and took a another look out the window.

Through the panes of the window, he saw tall spires of fluffy white clouds, towering above the sky in majestic glory as the glinted in the sunlight. Fawful was awed.

And for a split second, Fawful could have sworn he saw the wrinkled face of his mistress in the clouds, watching, and waiting for her toady to rise again, and make her proud.

"Cackletta..." He muttered "I have..."

"ATTENTION PASSENGERS!" A loud voice blared through the blimp's intercom. "WE SHALL BE LANDING IN GLITZVILLE SHORTLY. PLEASE REMAIN SEATED, AND ENJOY YOUR TRIP. THANK YOU FOR CHOOSING CHEEP-CHEEP AIRLINES."

Fawful looked out the window again, just as the puffy apparition of Cackletta disappeared into the ethereal blue.

Then, in the distance, he saw what looked like a large, solid form, glinting with the obvious signs of wealth and glamor, suspended in the air. As the blimp drew closer, the towering spires of buildings could clearly be seen.

It was a flying city.

Fawful smiled. "...confidence. I have confidence."

* * *

The first thing Fawful noticed as he stepped off the blimp was the brightness. Whether caused by the flying city being closer to the sun, or the various posters of fighters splashed with color, Fawful had to stand still for a moment while his eyes adjusted to the gleaming city.

The next thing was the smell. The delicious scent of hot dogs, hamburgers, and other greasy, delectable foods wafted slowly into his nose, taunting his stomach with the lustful promise of delicious dinners.

Standing there, with his pack slung across his shoulders, Fawful breathed in deeply.

"Ah, the city of Glitz, as Fawful arrives to it! Such a pain to be coming here, but the excitement Fawful feels is rivaled only by extremely happy trumpets playing a startling joyful song!"

Fawful was tempted to just stand there, letting the sights, sounds, and delicious smells of the carnival-like city overpower him. However, he knew that he had serious work to do, and so he set off to the large building adorned with a massive Chomp over the entrance...the Glitz Pit.

As Fawful approached the doors, he noticed a strange blue creature wearing sunglasses was standing around, trying to hand what looked like brochures to people.

"Howdy, ma'am, care for some information on the history of the Glitz Pi-...no? How 'bout you, fine sir? Informative brochures about...not interested?"

The blue thing turned to Fawful. "Howdy there, kiddo, wanna brochure? All free, and filled with more info than a calculator cramming for it's SATs!"

"I am not having kidness." Fawful replied. "I am being the unlucky age of thirteen. But the interest in the information of this place is having Fawful, so I am indeed taking a brochure of knowledge making!"

He took a paper from the bulky-creature's hands.

"Boy, you just grabbed yourself a mighty slice of history! Yessir, this place has a lot of backstory. I should know, I used to run it." He extended a muscular arm to Fawful. "Names Grubba."

Fawful eyed the hand suspiciously, unsure of what to do. His training with Cackletta had not included many lessons on social skills. So he decided to try small talk, just to move things along.

"You where of the running of the Glitz Pit, but not anymore? What had the happening to be making you a salesmen of brochures that nobody excepting Fawful is caring about?"

Grubba, which Fawful could now see was a member of the Clubba species, sighed. "Well son, thats a bit of my life I prefer not to think about. Whoo boy, now THAT was a dang sad chapter in my tale. But...seeing as no one else seems interested in my papers now, I guess I'll tell ya."

"Well, I'll start off by sayin' that in my youth, I never did care much for glitz or glory. Simple kinda person, ya'know? But then...I got into the business of fighting, and hot DANG, that was just plain great! I was famous, and I had moves that you wouldn't wanna shake two tails at, let me tell ya!"

He scratched the back of his muscular head. "Then, age snuck up on me, it dang-diddly did. So, I retired from the ring, became the promoter for the Glitz Pit, and for a while things where just peachy-nice and all..."

"The story, it bores Fawful's brain, like a white music note that loops itself. And he is having much busy-ness."

"Hold that thought, kiddo, I'm gettin' to the good part now. So anyway, rather than keep to myself and age gracefully, I thought. "Well, tarnation to this! I'm getting' back my fighting spirit!" So, I got myself a dang-cool machine to suck the very LIFE outta the Glitz fighters...and used it to make myself grow all buff and stuff."

Fawful was suddenly very interested. "So you are saying you where a villain of evilness? Fawful can have the respecting of villains who are evil!"

"Thats right, there sonny boy. And boy oh boy, for a while, I got away scott-free, I did! Then...the Great Gonzales came into the picture...and to make a long story short, I got whupped. Then thrown in prison. Oh yeah, that really took the pickle, let me tell ya."

Whether it was Grubba's tone, or an instinctive disdain towards heroic figures, Fawful instantly decided he hated this "Great Gonzales" character.

"And now you are being out of the jail of containing you...I am assuming you are wishing for much vengence?"

Grubba laughed. "Well...Ya see, they gave me this here special therapy in prison...helped me to get over myself, and get the rootin-tootin lead out of my life. Ya know, I got out, lived life a little, fell in love, got my heart heart broken, and now...well, Ms. Jolene, bless her heart, she was kind enough to let me work here in Glitzville again, doing odd jobs round the place. Plus..." He flexed his arms jauntily. "...all the exercise keeps these puppies nice and pumped, they shore do!"

"Oh..." Fawful replied, now bored of this reformed villain. "Where is being the place where Fawful can sign up to become a fighter who brings awesome to the plate of fighting?"

Grubba looked upward, las if he was listening to something in his head.

"Whats that?" He suddenly said. "Is this kid really ready for the Pit? I dunno..."

Fawful blinked. "Who is being the person that the Grubba who was once evil is speaking to?"

Grubba snapped, suddenly aware of his surroundings. "Hmm? Oh, nothin', just got a bit of a habit to talk to myself. Prison life can be pretty durn lonesome ya know. To answer your question, go talk to one them buff gaurds in the lobby. They'll take you to the manager, and ya'll just need to talk to her to get signed into the Glitz Pit."

Fawful nodded. "Then I am off to be displaying Fawful's trophy of persistence to the fighters of this Glitz, and its shall be striking much fear into their tiny brains!"

He started to walk off, when Grubba called out to him.

"Quick tip: Jolene, she's hardcore, durn right, but she's a real softie inside, believe you me. Go fer the heartstrings!"

Fawful nodded, as if he knew what the muscular Clubba was talking about then walked through the glass doors that lead into the Glitz Pit building.

* * *

"Right this way, sir."

As Fawful was escorted through the back-stage of the Glitz Pit, he tried to combat the butterflies in his stomach.

Judging from what Grubba had said, the manager was one tough crowd. What if he wouldn't be able to impress her? Where would he go? Would he be forced to crawl back into the hateful depths of the sewers, and...

"Calmness is what I am needing to be having. Fawful will impress the Jolene who is in charge of the Glitz Pit, and all the problems will be having solving...I am hoping."

"Here we are." The buff guard said, stopping in front of a wooden door. "Just knock on this door, and Jolene will be right with you. Also..." He leaned over Fawful's head. "I probably shouldn't tell you this, but Jolene can be one scary lady." He shuddered. "Just a heads up."

And he walked off.

Fawful gulped. Whoever this Jolene person was, if she could strike fear into a tough guard like that, then she must be pretty intimidating .

Fawful took a deep breath, and knocked.

"One moment, please."

Fawful heard someone unlock the door. Then, it opened.

He braced himself, and closed his eyes.

When he opened them, his jaw dropped.

Standing beyond it was a Toad woman, dressed in a smart, red business suit. She wore matching ruby heels, and had a sharp pair of glasses placed precariously on her nose.

"Can I help you?" She asked in a business-like tone.

Fawful blushed. He had not been expecting someone so...pretty.

Wait, since when did he care about how others looked? He was a mad scientist, for the love of beans!

But still...

"Er..." Fawful stammered. "Um...tongue...Fawful's...it is tying, but he does not know the whying! Um...er...chortles!...no, fury!...uh..."

The Toad woman pushed her slipping glasses up. "Sir, I'm a very busy person, so if you have nothing intelligible to say..."

"WAIT!" Fawful cried, holding the door that was about to be closed on him. "Fawful is now knowing exactly what he is to be asking! He was simply having notation about how nicely you dressed...but be scratching that!...er, Fawful is simply wishing to be joining the Glitz Pit! That is being it!"

The Toad sniffed. "Well...um...if you just said what I think you said, then you better step inside."

Before she could even step aside, Fawful ran into the office, cackling wildly.

"Excellence! Now when is Fawful beginning his fight for richness?"

The Toad shut the door. "Lets slow down for a minute...my name is Jolene. And I take it from your apparent third-party way of speaking that yours is...Fawful?"

"That is having correct! Now is Fawful ready to be fighting?"

Jolene rubbed her temples. "Mr. Fawful, if you would please let me speak for a moment..."

"I have the shutting of my mouth!"

"Thank you"

She sighed

"Okay then, ... We have your name established...what is your age and do you have any affiliations?"

"Fawful has had the unluckiness of thirteen gong his head! I am being a teenager, starting upon this day that is my adoption-day! As for affiliations, Fawful only associates with the great Cackletta and minions that are working for Fawful's schemes, though currently he has neither."

"I see...Why are you planning on joining the Pit?"

Fawful grinned. "To be earning coins that are funding many evil schemes of terror, to be spreading the butter of Fawful's empire across the fink-rat toast of the world! And to be having chortles as his mistress, the Great Cackletta, rules the world through Fawful's toadyish spirit! I have ghostly ruling!"

"I'm going to pretend I understood what you just said. Now...what do you think you have that would separate you from other fighters? What do you have that might draw the crowds to see you?"

"I have spirit, I have determination, and most importantly...I have Fawful! Yes, I am having lots of Fawful! And lots of Fawful equals lots of chortles! The crowd shall be drawing in by the house-loads to see Fawful, for he shall make them have snickers, like many truckloads of laughing gas! Lots of laughing gas!"

He threw his hands into the air. "I HAVE GAS!"

Awkward silence.

"Fawful is wishing to be rephrasing that last statement.

Jolene rubbed her temples. "Mr. Fawful, we get a lot of hopeful young men here...a LOT...and sometimes, they work well here...others...don't."

Fawful's grin fell fast. "Are...are you having the saying that you are thinking Fawful is setting his hopes too high, and should be finding a more suitable means to make a living?"

"I'm saying your a complete fruit-basket who would probably be reduced to a bloody pulp on your first fight."

Ouch.

"Fawful is wanting to hurt your face for saying that!" The Beanish boy shouted he remembered what Grubba told him. "But...instead I must have tongue-holding. Fawful pleads greatly! This is Fawful's only hope to be surviving! Without the coins of Glitz, Fawful shall wither into the emptiness of forgotteness, and his fury will be lost to the cosmos of trashed memories for good!"

"Mr. Fawful..."

He fell on his knees. "The shame I am having! But, still, the begging must be had! Please be letting Fawful fight...he is pleading with precisely forty-two cherries upon the top of the ice-cream sunday of begging! PLEASE!"

He wrung his hand for emphasis.

Jolene chewed the end of her lip. Fawful saw a hint of guilt in that pretty, yet cold face...a hint of hope.

"Fawful's mistress died, murdered by mustachioed men of pure nastiness! All Fawful wants is to be living, to be earning coins to survive and make her proud..."

And now for the kicker. "...because Fawful will never stop loving her."

"ALRIGHT!" Jolene shouted suddenly. "I'll sign you up, if its really that important to you. But..." Her face suddenly grew very dark. "...you had better draw the crowds, or I can guarantee that I will throw you out of this place faster than you can blink with those swirly eyes, do you understand?"

Fawful jumped to his feet. "The thankings, they are yours! Now can Fawful be fighting?"

"Hold on a moment. If we're going to do this, we need to establish a stage-name for you..."

She tapped her chin thoughtfully. "Hmm...lets see...you look like a bean, sort-of...the Mexican-Jumping Terror? No, too wordy...the Power Pinto?...not enough zing...lets see..."

Fawful tapped his foot impatiently.

"The Laughing Lima?"

Fawful clenched his fists.

"Master Pea is good...excepts peas don't belong in the Fabaceae family."

Fawful snapped.

"Just be picking one! Fawful is itching to fight! My anger grows, like a garbanzo that flourishes in the ground! I have fury!"

Jolene's eyes widened.

"Fury...Garbanzo...the Furious Garbanzo! Perfect!" She grabbed a pen from her desk, and jotted a few notes. "...alright, Mr. Garbanzo, I'll give you the tour of where you'll be staying for the remainder of your career here, I'll have sign a few papers and we'll all be set, okay?"

The Beanish laughed heartily."I have chortles!"

* * *

"Sign here...and here...and this waiver...and you should be all set, Mr. Garbanzo. Good luck, and feel free to start fighting when you please."

With a push of her glasses Jolene, walked away, leaving Fawful in the locker room of the Minor Leaguers.

The Beanish boy looked around. The place was a dump...the lockers where broken, with some of their doors hanging off their hinges. The floor was dirty, and Fawful could see only a single, lumpy looking mattress.

"Fawful is noting that the lockers here are stinking more than the ones Fawful's eyes had seen on the tour, which where not stinking!"

"Yeah, thats how they work around here, man."

Fawful spun on his heels to see a golden-shelled Koopa standing behind him.

"They take ya around to see all the flashy Major League stuff, trick you into putting your name on that contract and POW! Your a slave to the Pit, you hearing me? It keeps us motivated to fight for the majors, dawg!"

He extended a hand. "Names King K. Welcome to the Glitz Pit, homey! Whats the name they gave you?"

Fawful stared blankly at the Koopa's hand. "Um...the Furious Garbanzo, which is expressing Fawful's having fury and Beanishness."

King K withdrew his hand. "Er, okay then. These here, their our fellow Minor Leaguers, ya'know? This is Bandy Andy."

A green Bandit standing in a corner waved. "Hey there, newbie! Got any coins you can lend to run-down fella?"

"Over there is Master Crash."

"Hows it BOMB going?" A small Bob-omb asked.

"That fellow over by the bench is Cleftor."

"GRACK! Red cape sears Cleftor's brain! No come closer, or head will pop."

"And...thats about it."

Fawful stared at the bunch of Minor fighters with an intense disdain.

"You are being stuck in the lowliest spot upon the bottom of the Totem Pole of shame! Fawful scoffs at your patheticness! But not for long, for soon Fawful shall be leaving your sorry backsides to join the world of the Majors, which earn plenty more coins than here!"

The Minor Leaguers muttered angrily amongst themselves.

"Hey, dawg, that ain't cool. We're all buds he-"

"Your face is spitting with ugliness! I shield myself from such unworthy saliva!"

King K pointed at Fawful."Hey, you can forget any friendliness from us, you hear? We ain't gonna help the likes of jerks like you. Gonzales, now THERE was an awesome bro! He totally saved the world, real good! You should take some notes out of HIS page, bro!"

"GRACK. Mustache good. Cape suck."

Fawful stuck out his tongue, and approached the oddly-shaped shaped screen stuck into a wall. He pressed one of its buttons pushed a button.

Jolene's face appeared on the screen. "Ready for your first fight, Mr. Garbanzo? You shall be facing...the Goomba Bros! Now, I want you to appeal to the crowd, let them know that your new, your here, and you intend to unleash the pure greatness of your fighting spirit unto the field. I'll send someone to retrieve you."

And she was gone.

Fawful turned to his fellow Minor Leaguers. "And now, Fawful begs for you to be sitting in the seats of shame, as Fawful prepares to destroy Goombas in his first match in the coin-scheme of generating evil!"

He flexed arms. "And, now, I spank your souls!"

* * *

"That was the most pathetic performance I have ever seen in my entire career." Jolene stated angrily.

Fawful rubbed his bandaged head. "Your voice has annoying, it hurts Fawful's headache. Now Fawful's headache is complaining with pain."

"I cannot possibly believe that anyone could have lost to a small pack Goombas like that. It was a complete disgrace to the Glitz Pit, which is something that I cannot allow. Consider your contract terminated, Mr. Garbanzo."

"No!" Fawful yelled. "I am apologizing, but Fawful is needing to stay here in this hurtful place of Glitz!"

"Well...do you have a way to make ensure your next match will be victorious?"

Fawful scrunched his face, searching his brain for an answer.

Then he remembered...the weapons.

"Fawful has chortles! Your worrying is ceasing shortly, for Fawful knows exactly how I shall have winning like rainbows that beat up people! Fawful is just needing one more chance!"

Jolene pushed her glasses up her nose. "Very well, then. One last chance. I want you to have a victory on your next match...by tomorrow."

Fawful's heart grew cold. "Tomorrow? Such futureness is too soon for Fawful! He is needing more time if his weapons are to be working for purposes of fighting! I must have time!"

"Tomorrow, Mr. Garbanzo. Heres you payment for today's battle, though you hardly deserve it." Jolene handed Fawful three coins, then walked out of the locker room.

King K whistled. "Whoa dawg, you lost to Goombas? What happened?"

"Fawful's memory is fuzzy...maybe for his face is pained with hurt, but, it was something that was like this...

* * *

"...and, introducing, the mighty masher of heads, the power-house pinto...the Furious Garbanzo!" Jolene cried.

Fawful stepped out unto the Gltiz Pit...a massive room surrounded by bleaches that where filled with screaming fans made up of various species. In the center was a large stage, a platform held a few feet into the air. Over to the side, a large television screen displayed to all the fans the fights that would take place upon that stage.

The Beanish Boy stepped upon the stage, awed by the sheer rough beauty of it all.

"Mr. Garbanzo, any words before we begin your first fight?" Jolene asked, holding a mike to his face.

"Much of course! The honor, I have it! The chortles, I have them! The fury, I have so much, it bursts out of Fawful's eardrums! FEAR THE FURY!"

"Very well then. The Furious Garbanzo vs. the Goomba Bros. Now lets...BRAWL!"

A gong sounded. Fawful took a fighting stance.

"Now lets see....Fawful could start out with a roundhouse kick, like a Norris that Chucks...or perhaps a chortling Tiger-Leap punch of martial arting...or even..."

The Beanish boy pondered his next move, Goomba pack charged at him. He never saw them coming.

* * *

"...and then Fawful had the toothpaste squeezed out of him."

"Grack! Cape REALLY suck!"

"Seriously, FG, you got owned by the lowest of the low? Thats some serious crud there. But hey, thats what you get for being a real jerk, dawg."

Fawful was outraged. "The jerky! It is you! I kick jerky in the belly, to hurt it's face!"

The Beanish boy pulled back his legs, and planted a hardest kick he could muster on the Koopa's stomach.

The Koopa's hardened, shelled stomach.

"Ouchness! The foot tingles with the pain! Tingling ouchness!"

King K shook his head. "Pathetic." He said, and walked away.

Fawful held his leg, his mood plummeting rapidly. "Such fury...now Fawful must work on his weapon, if he is to be finishing by the date of whatever date tomorrow is!"

He took the makeshift bag that held his luggage, and dumped all the electronics upon the locker floor. He surveyed the mess with dismay.

"There is being no way that Fawful can be fixing his devices of owning people's faces in such a time that is short."

"Hey, wanna a know a secret to fighting in the Glitz Pit?"

Fawful looked up. Bandy Andy stood over him. "I know a little trick to do in battle. Its a sure-fire way to win. I could show you...IF you where willing to do ol' Bandy Andy a favor in the near future. What'ya say?"

Suspicious, the Beanish boy thought about this offer. On one hand, he probably wouldn't have any way to fix his weapons in time...on the other, his last encounter with one of these Bandit creatures ended with him being pushed into a Nibble-filled ocean.

"You are promising to my face that you shall not be feeding Fawful the gullible soup?"

"Look, just meet me in the Glitz Pit lobby in four hours. Hopefully, I'll see you there."

He walked off. Rather suspiciously, Fawful thought.

* * *

"ECHO!...echo...echo..."

"Be knocking it off, Bandy who is Andy."

When Fawful met Bandy Andy, the Green Bandit had shown him a secret entrance to the Glitz Pit, and they snuck in once the fighting was done for the day.

"Now have the explanation, for why are Fawful and the Bandy who is Andy standing in middle of the empty Glitz Pit?"

"Simple." Bandy Andy replied, hopping onto the center stage. "Its the perfect place to practice. No annoying gaurds, nothing to break, and we can be here all night if we have to. Now, stand there."

Fawful stood in the spot indicated by the Bandit.

"Okay, get ready in Five...four...three...SNEAK ATTACK!"

Before Fawful could so much as twitch, Bandy Andy landed a solid blow on his face, knocking him down.

Grunting painfully, the Beanish Boy hoisted himself up.

"The doing of that! Why did you make it happen?!?" Fawful cried, rubbing the sore spot on his face.

"Reflexes, man. Gotta test how fast you can react if you wanna learn the Supergaurd move. And boy, your reflexes are slower than a wriggler with pasta for legs."

Fawful was confused, and it must have shown on his face, for Bandy Andy continued.

"Its a special defensive move. You gotta take a defending stance at the right moment, and I mean the EXACT right moment, and then not only do you avoid taking damage, but you redirect the attack at the attacker, like...THIS!"

The Bandit landed another square punch on Fawful, thus knocking him over, and banging his head against the floor.

This was going to be a long night.

* * *

"C'mon man! It's almost sunrise, and you still haven't gotten it!"

"Spitting! At you! I am having...so much...rage...and pain...ergh..."

Fawful stood up, and cracked his neck.

"It is hopeless, too! Such is the way of life for Fawful! I cannot be having reflexes that are fast enough! I have defeat. I am wanting to go."

"One more time, okay? I don't intend to lose that favor you owe me. Think about victory...think about coins...think about SOMETHING!"

Fawful sighed. "Fine. The lastness of time. Let us be doing it.

"Okay then, ready...set...NOW!"

Bandy Andy's fist came flying for Fawful's face. The Beanish boy had only a split second to prepare for the impact.

Then he realized it.

This was his last oppurtunity. If he was beaten here, all would be lost. He would wither into nothing, and Cackletta's plans would be finished. For good.

And time slowed down.

Or at least it seemed. Before he could even register it, Fawful's hand was suddenly covering his face, making a perfect defensive position.

He braced himself, then...

BAM!

Bandy Andy was sprawled on the floor, X's replacing his eyes. Fawful was unharmed.

"Whoa!" The Bandit shouted, standing up quickly. "Man, I think you got it!"

Fawful stared at his hands. "I...have it! Like a camp counselor who is addicted to coffee, I have done it! O great Cackletta, I you havent been lost yet! Your toady shall be beefing all who trample him!"

Bandy And placed his arms around Fawful's neck, in a friendly fashion. "Couldn't have said it better than myself. Now, about that favor..."

Fawful was suddenly very worried. "You are wanting to collect it, I am supposing? Is it being tough for Fawful's hurting head to do?""

"You know what, kid?" Andy let go of him. "I like you so much, I'll drop the favor. Just go out there and use that new ability well."

"CHORTLES! Such niceness that is you, unlike the other fighters that Fawful was talking to! May raging slushies never be sucking your face! Although...I am being a teenager now, not, as you say, a "kid."

"Whatever you say. Oh, and feel free to drop by this place when its empty...good time to relax by yourself, if you don't get caught."

"Thankings! I must be off to have the reservation of the fighting against the Goombas that will have remorse!" And he walked off, leaving the Bandit to stand in middle of the empty stage.

Andy snickered.

And he held up the three coins he just snitched from the little Beanish boy.

"Yessiree." He said quietly. "I like you quite a bit, kid."

* * *

"I must say, Mr. Garbanzo, you have shown excellent improvement! You managed to defeat those Goomba Brothers fairly easily I noticed, and the crowd seems to be really enjoying your...colorful...speeches."

Jolene and Fawful where walking through the Glitz Pit lobby, discussing business.

"And the one who is you was stating that Fawful wouldn't make it! Fawful fears nobody! Not the mustachioed menaces of stupid, the magically stinking Koopa that is Bowser, nor the Grubba who had the sucking of power out of those who where irritating!"

Jolene pushed her slipping glasses up. "Well, I must say, you SHOULD fear the likes of some of our more prominent fighters...Rawk Hawk, the Iron Adonis Twins, Gonzales Jr, and if they choose to return, Prince Mush and the Great Gonzales. Now THOSE are certainly strong foes."

"Pff...Fawful isn't caring...Fawful has much power in his pinkies...in fact, there is being not one thing upon this entire world that can faze Fawful, not even..."

Quite suddenly, he stopped, shock briefly paralyzing him.

It took all of Fawful's strength just to keep him from collapsing.

There was a poster. One of many posters promoting fighters. But it wasn't the poster itself, it was the fighter who was displayed on it.

"Whats wrong, Mr. Garbanzo?"

The Beanish boy had the coherence to utter a single word, pointing a shaking finger at the bright parchment.

"Midbus!"

* * *

**A/N: Just so that we're clear, this is NOT a FawfulxJolene fic. That would creep me out. Until next time...have chortles!**


	4. Memory

**Chatper 3: Memory**

* * *

"Muh muh muh, that was cake." loneliness

Midbus, AKA "the Ground Porker" had just walked into the Major League's locker room, a rare smile plaid across his face.

"It was cake. And I ate it. I ate it good."

"I take, master Porker, that your match went well?" The Koopinator, a high-ranking Dark Koopatrol, commented.

"Yes, they got whupped. Soon, I'll be number one. Then I take down Rawk Hawk. Then I become champ. I will win."

At this moment, a young black Yoshi walked into the room.

"Hey, good match, Mr. Porker." Yo-Yo, aka "Gonzales Jr." complimented. "You beat me fair and square. Better watch your back, though, cuz I'm coming after ya!"

Midbus looked down at his recently beaten foe. "I don't watch back. You no match for me. Nobody is a match for me. You are pathetic."

The little Yoshi stuck out his tongue. "Well, excuse me for trying to be friendly, man."

The pig turned his back to Gonzales Jr, and sat down upon a bed.

"Must train. Harder. Must train harder, If I'm going to win championship." The muscular pig muttered.

At this moment, the guard to the Major League room walked in.

"Mr. Ground Porker?" He asked. "Theres someone out here who wants to see you."

"Muh. Tell them I'm busy. I don't care for fans. Just winning."

"Its actually not a fan, sir. He claims to be from the Minor Leagues."

Midbus scoffed. "Worse. I don't talk to scum. It makes me scummy. Tell them to leave."

The guard nodded. "Alright, sir...but, you should know, this guy told me, quote-unquote, "That if the one who is pink and muscular and having the nose of a pig is not being out here to be greeting the one who is I, then I shall peel the carrot of regret with your sad face."

Midbus glanced upward, lost in thought. Something about that message clicked in his tiny brain...something familiar.

"Fine. I see this scum. But I don't like it." He said.

Hopping off the bed, the burly pig strolled out of the room, and glanced around the hallway.

It didn't seem like anybody was there...

Then, something grabbed his beefy leg.

"MIDBUS!" A high-pitched voice cried. "Such is the way of fate, the minion of mine returns to the one who I! Such chortles I have! So many chortles!"

Midbus was shocked. "Who are you? How do you know my name? Where are you?" He called, unable to see where the voice came from.

"Be glancing down at your protruding gut, pig of silliness, and be slapped with recognition!"

Midbus looked down, to see the tiny figure of...

"...Fawful?"

* * *

Fawful was overjoyed.

"Such recognition! Your face finally sees the truth! And now, togertherness we have! With my planning of evil plans, and your punching of stuff I planned to have punched, the beating shall commence! I have fury! But the good kind!"

Midbus looked alarmed."How did you..."

He hugged Midbus's leg again. "Fawful is being so emotional! He though he was alone in the world, and had given up hope of ever seeing his minion again. But now the wrongness of that has been proven! Now our plans can have newness!"

"Fawful..."

"And such cleverness from you! It must have been you who left the poster advertising the Glitz Pit in Fawful's shop! You had the knowing of your master's return, so you left the clue of cleverness to help him find you, while you where off making coins ahead of time using your punching beef! Such cleverness!"

"Fawful, I..."

"Please be having quiet. We must begin the plans of new! Starting with this: I am believing we should put rockets of propulsion on the moon, then we can be causing an eclipse of much sun blocking, like twelve elephants doing taxes on a..."

"FAWFUL!" Midbus shouted. "Let me speak. How you ended up here, I don't know. But I am saying, I have moved on."

There was a stunned pause. "W-What? Midbus yelled at Fawful? A-And what are you meaning by "moved on?"

Midbus sighed. "When I was frozen, thanks partly to you, it took a long time to thaw. When I did, I learned you had been killed. I traveled the land, looking for work. Needed coins. Maybe find a new way to conquer the kingdom. So I came here. I fought. I won. A lot. Now I don't want to leave. I'm done with world domination."

Fawful felt like someone had punched him square in the gut. "But...Fawful is not killed anymore! I have revival! A-And you where supposed to be Fawful's toady, like a toady that Fawful once was! What is happening?!?!"

"I'm done. With evil. Now I fight, here in the Glitz Pit. That is where I belong." Midbus replied curtly.

"If that is being so, then how did we be ending up in the same place that is here?!?" Fawful asked, worriedly.

Midbus shrugged. "Coincidence. Maybe."

Quite suddenly, Fawful felt like he was going to vomit. How could Midbus, of all the people in the entire world, do this to him?

"Midbus...are you having certainty about this?"

"Quite."

Fawful suddenly found himself shaking uncontrollably, rage taking a hold of his senses. He was hurt, and he knew it, but wanting to maintain a macho villain look, he launched into a furious tirade.

"Well...Fawful doesn't care! He...he scoffs at your ignorance, for you have plenty of it! The regretting is yours when I have the conquering of this kingdom! I hate you! So much hatred...it makes me pulsate with fury! I HAVE PULSATION!"

Midbus sighed. "Good luck. You need it. Maybe we see each other in the Pit someday."

And with that, he turned his back to his former boss, and headed back into the locker room.

"Well...sucking to you!" Fawful called. "I beat your face with the pineapple of so much regret! I cannot possibly hope to express all of my not caring, that you had the abandonment! Are you having the hearing?!? I HAVE NOT CARING!"

He looked down at the floor, bitterness eating away his heart. "...so much not caring."

* * *

Fawful sat alone in the empty Glitz Pit. Alone, hungry, and utterly miserable.

"Such stupidness is Midbus." He muttered to himself. "Here is his second chance to be transformed into the porky minion of Fawful, and he has the _soap_ to be refusing! Soap!"

He kicked one of the seats angrily. "But who is caring? Not Fawful, that is being for sure! He has not a single noodle from the pasta of caring! Not one...measly...noodle..."

He sighed. He desperately wished he had a hot dog to distract him. But he didn't have enough coins yet, so he decided to wallow in his misery.

The emotional pain seemed familiar to the Beanish boy...a feeling that he remembered having before in his previous life.

It was about seven years ago, back when he was six...

* * *

"Cackletta...O great Cackletta! I am running to you with much speedy!"

Young Fawful ran through the halls of the mighty witch Cackletta's lair, heaving a large book with him.

He burst through the doors to Cackletta's laboratory, where the witch herself was, working with some beakers containing foul-smelling liquids.

"CACKLETTA!" Fawful cried.

"Eyahgha!" The witch screeched, dropping the vial, which shattered into the floor. "Fawful, don't do that!" Cackletta shouted, pointing a wrinkly finger at the spilled liquid. "You're lucky my Essence of Utter Death formula wasn't complete, or we would both be pushing Piranha Daisies right now!"

"I am apologizing now, Cackletta, but I am having anxiety!" Young Fawful cried. "I am having a question that only the your brilliant bean-shape face can be answering! It is of much importance that I know!"

Cackletta smiled wickedly. She was always happy to answer whatever evil question her little apprentice had to throw at her. "Eeyah ha ha ha! Well thats fantastic! What do you want to know, my star pupil? The Basics of Badness?" She lifter her hands into the air. "The Mechanics of Malice?" She tooka frightening pose. "Or, my personal favorite, the Loud Linguistics of Loathsome Laughter? Eeyah ha ha ha!" Cackletta threw back her laugh and went into a maniacal laughing spree.

Fawful looked up with a sincere, serious face."Are you being my mother?"

Cackletta suddenly stopped laughing. "Eeyah...what?"

Young Fawful held up the large book he been carrying. "I had the studying of this book of genetics, and the information it presents surprises my head."

He slammed the hefty tome and the ground, and opened to a page. "I have had the examination of our genetic traits, and have found little similarities between them! Having taking into account skin tone, eye color, nose size, head width, and other such things, I have judged the likely hood of a mother-son difference between us on this level to be 3,751,430,042 to 1 against."

He looked up from his book. "So I am asking...are you being my mother, O Great Cackletta, with such an improbable likelihood of relation?"

Cackletta stared at Fawful, stunned. "How does a six-year old figure that out?"

"Please be answering my question. Are you, Great Cackletta, the mother that I always assumed that you where?"

Silence.

Cackletta sighed. "Well, I guess I knew this day would come eventually. Sit down, Fawful, I have to tell you a story."

Fawful grinned. "Is it being the tale of long ago when you blew up the face of the door-to-door salesman who tried to sell you a vacuum machine of ripping-off? That is being one of my favorites!"

"No. And sit down."

He obediently sat down upon the floor.

Cackletta began pacing.

"Once, upon a time, there was a witch. A mean, crusty, evil witch. She had no children, nobody to take over her life's work to in case she...passed into another world."

She looked at Fawful, solemnly. "Though she tried to deny it, she was sad. She wanted an apprentice, somebody to teach and to show the ways of all the evil practices she did. Someone to care for, and to mentor, and be responsible for. But, she was convinced that there was nobody in the entire world who was malignant enough, smart enough, sadistic enough to be worthy of having her as their master."

"And so..." She continued, after a pause. "She waited for the final curtain to be drawn, for the last moments of her existence to arrive...for her game to end, and swallow her sadness."

The young Beanish boy clasped his hands in horror. "Oh, the sadness! What has become of this witch who is evil and sad? I must have knowing!"

"Well..." Cackletta continued. "...one day, the witch went out for a walk in the woods. It was a bright, sunny day, the sort of day she absolutely hated. But, out of sheer boredom, she went out for a walk anyway."

"Deep within the heart of the woods, amongst the tall trees and cool, crisp air, the witch felt more miserable than ever. She knew, deep within her heart, that she would give anything, ANYTHING for an apprentice. And then, she heard it...crying The high-pitched sound of a child crying"

Fawful was hopping with excitement. "Such a twist, like a lemon in a beverage that is otherwise plain! I have interest!"

"Indeed. Anyway..." Cackletta continued. "The witch, drawn by the sound of sadness, followed the sound of the child sobbing, through the trees and bushes and shrubs, until she found a small basket, cradled within the roots of a large, knotty tree."

Fawful was leaning in close now, drinking every word that his mistress was saying.

"And within the basket, woven from the finest wood in all the kingdoms, was a baby boy. A small, baby boy, swaddled in a red blanket, and possessing a horribly large mouth full of teeth. And the witch picked up this little boy, looking at it straight in it's young, yet insane eyes. In her perceptive nature, she saw cruelty, malice, and an ingenious mind that would one day engineer misery and sorrow for others. And she knew, that that little monstrosity, that little catalyst of evil...was the most wonderful thing to ever happen to her."

She looked down at Fawful. "She adopted this little boy, abandoned by his parents, and raised him like she would her own son. She taught him secrets of the evil ways, and together, they went to conquer the pathetic Kingdoms that surrounded them, and created a perfect world just for them! Eya ha ha! And they lived happily ever after."

Young Fawful stood up, and clapped. "Bravo! Encore! Such storytelling, it is having epicness and an ending of happy!" He sat down. "But, O Great Cackletta, how does such a marvelous tale pertain to my question that I wonder about?"

Cackletta sighed. "Fawful...that story...it actually happened.I am the witch...and you where the little baby in the basket."

The cold hand of shock grabbed the little Beanish boy's heart."W-What? W-What are you saying to my stuttering face?"

"Fawful, I should have told you this long ago, but...from what I could tell, you where abandoned as a baby. Left in the woods."

Fawful's lip trembled.

"But..." Cackletta added hastily. "Your parents left a supply of beans for you to eat in your basket, and they kept you in a part of the woods where there where no dangerous animals, and they left you in plain sight. You left to be saved, not to be harmed."

Tears clung the edges of the young boy's eyes. "Abandoned? L-left because I wasn't wanted, like a microscopic pig that is too small to made into bacon? W-Why?"

Cackletta leaned over Fawful, and put a wrinkled hand on his tiny shoulder. "Listen, Fawful, I'm going to tell you something thats out of character for me, and I don't intend to repeat it, and you must swear to NEVER tell anyone I said it, understand?"

Fawful nodded glumly.

"I love you Fawful...I love you just as any mother would love her son. You might not be my _actual_ son, but you are just as good as one, and I will never, EVER abandon you...understand?"

The young Beanish boy looked at his mistress gloomily. "Yes, Cackletta, that is making me have slightly less sorrow."

"Your still sad, though, huh?"

Fawful nodded slowly.

The witch adopted a stern look."What did I tell you about sadness? You must turn it into rage...into hatred...into FURY...now what do you have, my apprentice?"

Fawful sniffed. "I...I...I have..."

"Yes?"

"I have...f...f..."

"Go on."

"F...fur...fuuurr..."

"Almost, my apprentice...what...do...you...HAVE?"

Fawful stood up, suddenly overcome with adrenaline. "I...have...FURY!"

Cackletta reared back and laughed. "Eya ha ha ha! YES! Have fury, my star pupil! Have all the fury you can muster!"

"I have fury! I have rage! I have lack-of-sorrow!" Fawful cried, running around wildly, laughing jauntily. "My brain has already forgotten the stupid sadness that it once hatched, because it has FURY!"

"Eyah ha ha!" Cackletta laughed. "Oh, and just to put the icing on the cake..." the witch opened a drawer in one of the workshop's desks, and pulled out some sort of ray gun. "...go out and shoot something. That'll make you feel better." And she threw the device to her apprentice.

Young Fawful cackled evilly, and forgetting about his previous sadness, went out to have fun with a dangerous weapon.

* * *

But that was the past. Present Fawful had sorrow once more, amidst the emptied fighting arena.

"F-First, Fawful's parents left him, and Fawful was left unwanted" he said to himself, his stutters echoing throughout the empty Pit. "A-And then...the Great Cackletta abandoned him, through death...and now...n-now...M-Midbus, Fawful's own minion...h-has moved on, without his m-master."

It took all his will to hold the tears back. "Is there being nobody for Fawful? Is Fawful always to be tossed aside in the decomposing fruit pile of life? CAN NOBODY HAVE THE LIKING OF FAWFUL!?!?"

The last question bounced of the walls, echoing his depression. But there was no answer to accompany it.

The little Beanish boy sighed. "Fawful should be heading back...the time for the Glitz Pit to have re-openess approaches, and I should be preparing for the next match of fighting." He muttered, gloomily.

With a great heave, he lifted himself out the seat, and trudged wearily back to the locker room, his sad memories continuing to haunt him all the while.

* * *

"And now, for the next match...the Bean of Massive Mutilation, the Furious Garbanzo!"

The audience roared as Fawful, stepped onto the stage. He was still hurting from the events of yesterday, but he had managed to put aside his feelings for now, in the name of his new career.

He waved to the cheering fans. "Such kindness spouts from your faces!" He called out. "I am hoping to please your heads today, like a disgusting earthworm that hideously eats the corpse of..."

"Versus..." Jolene said, interrupting the graphic simile. "...the Shell Machines of Doom, the KP Koopas!"

King K accompanied by another gold-shelled Koopas and a Paratroopa, hopped on the other side of the stage. "Hey, FG, we're gonna make you pay for what you said to us the other day, dawg!"

"_Ding_!...is the sound of the waiting elevator of patience EATING YOUR HEAD!" Fawful cried. "I have FURY!"

The crowd roared, excited by this statement.

Jolene leaned over, and whispered into Fawful's ear. "Nice job with the taunts, Mr. Garbanzo. The audience is really responding to it. Keep it up."

The Toad returned to her mike."Now lets...BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAWL!"

GONG!

The match begun

Suddenly, before Fawful could so much as blink, a hard object slammed into him, knocking onto his back.

"Oof! My stomach is screeching with pain!"

He got up, and saw a flash of gold heading straight for him. He managed to Supergaurd just as the Koopa's shell slammed into him, protecting him from harm. The Koopa in question quickly got up, and ran back to join his fellow fighters on the other side of the ring.

He looked back at the trio of reptiles...they where fast, sliding along the ground with their shells. But he wasn't going to let _that_ intimidate the Furious Garbanzo!

"Now it is the turn of you!" He yelled, and ran towards the group.

They stood there, looking entirely unfazed.

Fawful ran, and leaped into the air, intending to tackle the one up front, and was met with...the floor. He stood up, and looked around. He was sure they where here a second ago...

He spotted on of the Koopas, on the opposite side of the stage. Giving a furious cry, the Beanish boy charged, and attempted another tackle, when suddenly, the Koopa was...gone. He fell once more on the floor.

"What the Fracktail? The yellowed turtles of stupid keep disappearing from Fawful's attack! What is the happening?"

"Heh, told ya you'd pay, FG."

Fawful looked up, too see King K standing over him, looking down at the Beanish boy with a smirk.

"See, the thing about Koopas is, our shells are frictionless...letting us move at _mean_ speeds, dawg. You'll have a hard time catching us."

Fawful quickly got up, and addressed the Koopa angrily. "Well, though you might be speeding with fastness that is too much for Fawful too be catching, it is I who shall have the chortles now, for you are standing right in front of Fawful, who shall now punch your face!"

King K laughed. "Oh yeah, and the thing about Paratroopas...when fighting with them, you always gotta look upward."

He pointed to the sky, ominously.

Suddenly, a pair of hands reached from above Fawful's head, and grabbed him by the arms. He was quite suddenly lifted into the air, and rising fast. Fawful kicked, and struggled, but the Paratroopa held fast.

"Be letting go of the one who is attempting to kick your face, who is being Fawful."

"If you say so, dawg."

And he let go off him. From twenty feet in the air.

_thud_.

The crowd _"oohed" _Fawful slammed into the floor.

Fawful felt like lying there, having fallen face down onto the floor of the Pit. But, using almost all of his remaining strength, and plenty of groaning, he managed to get up.

He felt woozy. He felt tired. And above all, he felt frustrated. How was he going to _beat _these guys? Their attacks where so fast, he could only barely protect himself against them... and his offensive tactic was too slow. Not to mention that annoying Paratroopa flying above him was being a problem, waiting for the right moment for a sneak attack.

"Stupid Koopas who speed with shells, stupid Paratroopa, who swoops with stupid bird-likeness." Fawful muttered to himself, seeing no way to win. Then, something clicked in his brain.

_.._Paratroopa...Speeding shells...

Eureka! He had it! He just needed to use some perfect timing...

Fawful waited. Then, he saw it...a shadow on the floor was circling him, Something in the air was flying around him, like a bird of prey getting ready to strike...the Paratroopa.

The shadow grew...closer...closer...closer....

Then, with a suddenl movement, Fawful leaped upward, and grabbed the flying Koopa, who had been preparing to strike the Beanish boy from the air. Fawful clung to the Paratroopa with all his might, as it tried to shake him off in the air. Finally, using his weight, Fawful brought the Troopa down to the ground, and wrestled his way on top.

"ARDRANALINE! IT EATS YOUR STUPID NOSE!" Fawful cried, and punched the Troopa hard on the snout.

"Ouch! Yo, that hurt real bad, man!" Unable to take any more abuse, the grounded Koopa pulled in to his hardened shell for protection

Fawful smiled. Now for phase two.

Grabbing the shell, Fawful ran to his edge of the stage. The audience fell silent, curious to see what the little guy was going to do.

All eyes upon him, he looked around the ominously silent Pit. And with a vicious smile, he held the Koopa shell above his head.

"Hey, whats the kid doing with Herb's shell, man?" King K asked his partner.

"Dunno, dawg. We better get 'im."

King K and his remaining cronie crept closer to Fawful, side-by-side, intending to do a KO ram upon the boy once they got close enough.

Fawful could see they would soon be within striking distance. He waited anxiously, clinging the shell of Herb against his chest. Just a little closer...

There! Now, to unleash the coup de grace!

"I hurt your faces!" He cried, and charged.

Adrenaline pumping through his body, Fawful dove unto the floor, still clinging to the shell. Using its frictionless underbelly, he slid along the floor like a tobaggon rider on a snowy plain.

King K looked shocked. "Dang! We're gonna get..."

POW!

Before the Koopas could react, they where struck by the sailing Beanish boy like bowling pins, and where sent flying high into the sky. Audience members screamed and ran for cover to avoid being hit by the unexpectedly airborne turtles.

Fawful laughed, elated at his victory. Then he realized...he had no way to stop.

Still clinging to the speeding shell for dear life, the Beanish boy careened off the Glitz Pit stage, unable to slow down

For a split second, he wondered exactly how much that brick wall he was about to slam into at 20 miles per-hour was going to hurt.

He got his answer. And he knew no more.

* * *

"Hey...I think he's waking up...ya'll opening those peepers, kid?"

Fawful opened his eyes, and instantly regretted it. The bright lights triggered a searing headache across his forehead. Standing above him, was a recognizably beefy figure.

"G-Grubba?" He croaked. "...what are having the doing of here? Where am I being? What has happened?"

The blue Clubba laughed excitedly, worsening the Beanish boy's headache. "Hyuk yuk yuk! Kid, I'll tell ya'll whats goin' on! Yer a STAR! You did that freaky thing with that Koopa's shell, and POW! Ya'll went ahead and one the flippin match, you darn-tootin did!"

"I..I had the winning?"

"Garbanzo, ya'll did more than just win...you made yourself famous! Everyone loves an underdog, and you just made yourself the dang-diddle king of 'em, whoo boy! Fan letters have been pourin' in like day old gravy!"

The blue Clubba turned his back to Fawful, and picked up a hefty mailbag, setting it down by Fawful's bedside. "See this? Most Minor Leaguers usually get three or four letters a month. These are from the first _hour _after ya'll knocked yourself unconscious! Over nine hundred letters! People love ya kid, they shore do!"

Fawful rested his head upon the pillow, shocked at the turn of events.

"Ahem, excuse me?"

Grubba stepped aside, and standing on the other side of what Fawful could now see was the Minor League locker room, was a small Toad girl, with violet spots covering her cap.

"Hey, what are ya'll doin' here? This here locker room is fer fighters, and staff like myself, only!" Grubba exclaimed angrily.

Ignoring the Clubba, the little Toad walked up to Fawful's bedside.

"Excuse, Mr. Furious Garbanzo? My name is Fan C...I'm a Toad who lives here in Glitzville, and I saw your match against those Koopas, and...I AM YOUR BIGGEST FAN!" She suddenly shouted.

" Can I have your autograph, please? And could you make one for my brother too, cuz he's a real big fan of you too, and so are my parents, and my pet Chomp, oh, and are there any plushies of you for sale, cuz I would, like, totally buy one for a million coins, and your just so plain awesome, I could kiss you, can I please?, oh your just so..."

Grubba grabbed Fan C. and carried her to the door. "Time to go, missy."

"You'll be hearing from me again, Mr. Garbanzo!" The Toad called out. "I'm your biggest FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!" And was promptly thrown out of the room.

Grubba chuckled. "See that, Garbanzo? That was one of your fans...one of them crazy, obsessive vampire-loving female types, I believe. Also, the Glitz Channel's ratings have shot up, they shore did! Whoo boy, I wouldn't be surprised if ya'll where offered a licensing deal soon!"

Fawful smiled weakly. "I...I have fame? E-Even though my face is hurting, and my teeth are crying with soreness at the hitting of a brick wall, I am still having triumph! Cackletta shall have proudness at me...and Midbus, that pig of much idiotness, shall be seeing that I am not needing him! I am only needing...FURY! AND I HAVE LOTS OF IT!"

Fawful felt pride shoot through him, happiness at this wonderful turn of events lifting his spirits...only to have cold realization and panic clutch his heart.

"Grubba!" He suddenly said. "Did your face just tell Fawful that he was being displayed on something called the "Glitz Channel"?

"Hyuk yuk yuk, thats right!" Grubba replied. "The Glitz Channel broadcasts Glitzville related news all over the place. Anyone in the whole ding-dang Mushroom Kingdom can see that crazy face face of yours, Garbanzo. Anybody!"

Fawful gulped nervously. Anybody in the Kingdom...

* * *

"Mario! Mario! MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARIO!"

Mario, plumber, adventurer, and the hero of the Musrhoom Kingdom, looked up from the tree he was gazing at. Running toward him at high speed, was his younger brother, the meek Luigi.

"Luigi!" He called out. "Is there-a something wrong?"

Luigi reached his brother, horror crossing his panting face. "Huff...whoo...inside...house...TV..."

"Luigi, you-a look like you where refused an invitation to the next Smash Bros tournament!"

Luigi took a minute to catch his breath, and then looked at his brother with the utmost seriousness.

"Bro, your not going to believe who I just saw on the Glitz Channel.

* * *

**A/N: Thats right! The Mario Bros have just gotten involved! He he, this could get interesting...**


End file.
